P&G: Charmin Bath Tissue, 1960s

Genre: Commercial

Year Published: 1960s

Creator: Procter and Gamble D'Arcy Masius Benton & Bowles (DMB&B)

Format: 16mm

Description: Transcription: - And you've worked for NBC a long time. 0:02 You know, I almost didn't get out here. 0:04 This is a true story. 0:07 I want you to know that the ladies' room is locked. 0:08 And for a place as big as NBC... 0:12 I mean, what are they afraid you're going to steal in there? 0:14 You know what I mean? 0:16 I had to go to the garage across the street to get the key. 0:17 (audience laughs) 0:20 Are they afraid I'm going to squeeze the Charmin? 0:22 Why would they- 0:24 Jerry Squeeze the what? 0:25 The Charmin. 0:26 Oh, you don't have that in LA. I forgot. 0:27 You live in LA. You don't have that commercial. 0:29 - No. 0:32 They have a little man who's busy watching women. 0:33 Right kids? 0:36 Squeeze the Charmin. 0:36 See in New York, we're alive. 0:38 We have people that squeeze... 0:40 - In New York, 0:42 you have people in the ladies' room squeezing? 0:43 (audience laughs) 0:44 That's alive? 0:47 Guest Give me a kiss. 0:48 Oh, you know, 0:50 he's the only man I know that smells of Lysol. 0:51 (audience laughs) 0:53 You are so clean! 0:56 - It's from squeezing the Charmin. 0:58 - No, I never met anyone this clean. 1:00 He doesn't use deodorant. He uses Lysol! 1:03 God forbid a bug should touch him. It'd drop dead instantly! 1:07 Let me see your shoes. 1:12 I want to see your shoes before we go. Let me see. 1:13 (slaps desk) I never in my... 1:18 A dirty sole! 1:19 I never saw him, that's the first... 1:21 He never wears shoes twice. 1:23 - Yes I do! Will you stop that? That's ridiculous. 1:24 - No you don't! You're such a liar. 1:26 - I am not a liar! I wouldn't lie. 1:27 There's no reason in the world. 1:29 I swear, they carry him to this chair 1:30 so that his feet don't get dirty. 1:32 He don't like... 1:34 Yes, he's sort of crazy. 1:35 Right? Rue knows, Rue knows. 1:36 His jockey shorts are made out of paper. 1:39 (audience laughs) 1:41 So that they dispose of them right after he's through. 1:42 Like this. They walk. So he shouldn't get dirty. 1:45 It's true, Jerry. 1:48 You are the neatest person I have ever known 1:49 in my whole life. 1:52 - Did anyone ever tell you you look like Rod Steiger? 1:53 (audience laughs) 1:56 In The Sergeant. 2:01 - See, I just go... 2:04 I snicker that off. 2:05 Jerry Do you? 2:07 - Remarks like that, I can... 2:07 Push this away. 2:10 Jerry They fall right off. 2:11 - Yeah, I wanted to wear something to cover... 2:12 Oh, look at this. 2:15 (audience laughs) 2:16 Now is that embarrassing? 2:18 I tuck that into the dress and (indistinct). 2:20 (audience laughs) 2:23 I got so thin everything hangs on me, you know? 2:27 (audience laughs) 2:29 - You know something? 2:32 (audience applauds) 2:33 Can I see that again? Please? Let me see it. 2:37 You know you've got enough there for another person? 2:39 (audience laughs) 2:41 We'll be right back. Would you excuse us? 2:43 Guest Without me. Tell the people I have to go. 2:45 - No, she doesn't have to go yet. 2:47 Guest I'm hungry, Jerry. 2:47 - All right, so you can go and have a (indistinct). 2:48 Now here's something very new and very exciting from Singer. 2:50 Would you watch this please? 2:54 Guest Oh, I use them all the time. 2:55

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