Why Is It Always Me? (1980)

Heat. Heat. [Music] Hey, what are you doing? That's mine. >> It's mine. It was just laying there. >> I just put it down. You know it's mine. Now give me the book. >> Mrs. Brown. Mike's taking my book. >> What? >> All right, Mike. Give Brian back his book and sit down. >> Why is it always me? What about him? I want that book. You liar. >> Give Brian his book right now. >> Here. >> I've had it with your temper. You may not come back into this library until I've had a note from your parents. >> Oh, who cares? I hate this place. [Music] [Music] Well, Mike, it looks like it happened again. He got into trouble. I get blamed for everything. I can't help it. Things just happen to me. >> It looks like things happen to you because you haven't learned how to solve your problems. >> Problems? What problems? I don't have any problems. Those stupid kids and teachers would give me problems. If it wasn't for them, my life would be just great. >> Okay, they give you a problem, but you sure didn't solve it in the way that helps you. Mike, you just aren't making good decisions. You know, thinking of what might happen and looking for answers. It looks like learning some problem-solving steps could help you deal with these people. Like what for instance? >> Like today in the library. Fighting with Brian didn't help you. He may have been wrong in taking that book, but you quickly decided to fight over it. You didn't think of any other ways to solve that problem. >> Well, I just don't think of anything else. When I get mad, I lose control. >> That's why it's important to take time and to learn the steps in problem solving and use them instead of automatically giving up or fighting. >> Wait a minute. I thought solving your problems depended on other things. I know what you need to solve your problems. >> Emily, that was really an excellent report. Very well organized. Very good indeed. Now, we'll have Mike's report. Mike, you are ready for your report, aren't you? Oh, well to tell you the truth. >> Fire alarm. Everybody against the wall. Single file. We'll have Mike's report tomorrow. >> That's what you need to solve your problems. Lots of luck. >> Of course, luck is only one way to solve a problem. I found when you have a problem with another person, the person who wins is the stronger or tougher one. This will solve a problem. Hey, you [Music] are [Music] [Music] I have a problem, friend. You have a book I need for a report. And you don't want me to miss my report, do you? >> Here, uh, take my book, and I got some notice on it, too. I hope they help you. >> We'll see about that. That's what you need to solve your problems. Muscles. And there's one other way. You need to be real smart to solve your problems. [Music] Good. The computer finally agrees with my solution. How to get along with my little sister. Good boy. That's how to solve your problems. You got to be real smart. >> Those dreams never come true. I'm not lucky, tough, or smart enough to solve my problems. >> Hold on, Mike. You're making a big mistake. You don't need to depend on those things to solve your problems. The best way to solve them is by dividing them into five steps. Just like a road map, you can use these steps to find an answer. >> What are the steps? >> Just look around. [Music] >> Identify the problem. >> Right? That's the first step. Find out exactly what the problem is. Find out all the facts and reasons for the problem. [Music] Describe the possibilities. >> Right. Step number two. Decide what are the different ways you might be able to solve the problem and use your imagination. The more ideas you come up with to possibly solve the problem, the better. [Music] >> Number three, evaluate your ideas. >> Exactly. Take each idea you've come up with and think what would happen if you did it. Will the result help you or hurt you? [Music] Number four, act out a plan. >> After you've evaluated all the possibilities, pick out the one that you think serves you best. Then turn it into the answer that you can act on and use it. >> Learn. >> Yep. That's the final step. Find out if your answer was the best and learn from the experience. If it didn't work, go back and try another idea. ideal. I don't get it. >> Well, it's the first letter of the five steps we've just learned. Remember, identify, describe, evaluate, act, and learn. It's the ideal way to solve problems. Any problems. >> Okay. The ideal way. How do I make it work? >> Think back about the fight in the library. You chose to fight without even thinking of doing something else. Think you can come up with a better idea? Yeah, I guess. >> Okay, let's go back over that fight and see how problem solving might have helped you. [Music] >> What are you doing? That's mine. >> It's mine. It was just laying there, >> you know. >> Wait a second. Before I start yelling, let me think. What was that word for solving problems? Oh, yeah. Ideal. First step is to identify the problem. Well, we both want the same book. How can I get to use a book without getting in trouble? All right. The second step is decide what I might do about the book. H I can fight for it. I could flip a coin for it and let the winner have it. Or I can share the book and let him have it and look for another. Let me think about these ideas. The fighting is out. I just get into more trouble. I don't want to flip a coin because I might lose and I really want to use that book. While I could share it, there's still enough time for us to both read it. That would work. The fourth step is to act out the plan. I know. I'll tell you both want to use the book and offer to share it. Let's see what happens. >> Uh, hey Brian, it looks like we both want the same book on the Civil War, huh? I guess you're doing the same report I am. >> Yeah. Uh, we still got time before the report's due. Maybe we could share it, >> I suppose. >> Okay, you take it first and I'll take it next. >> I'll give it to you after school Friday. Thanks. [Music] >> It works. Okay, I get the picture. Helps to think things out before you act and go through the steps of problem solving. But can you guarantee this will work? >> No. But following those steps will help you solve more problems and in better ways. Most problems you solve won't fall into five steps, but you can still use them to get answers. >> Thanks a lot for teaching me the steps. I'll try to remember them next time I get in trouble at school. I guess I did do a lot of dumb things because I didn't think. >> Mike, school isn't the only place that problem solving can help you. It can help you at home, too. Whenever you get upset, remember what you've learned. Oh, you do get upset at home sometimes, don't you? >> Upset? Oh, brother, do I get upset. But that problem solving stuff won't work with my parents. They're impossible. Always treating me like a little kid. Every the same things. You can't solve problems with them. Just ends up in an argument. I got to go. >> Hi, Dad. >> Hi. How was school? Fine. But some kids start a fight with me in school today and you have to sign a note. >> It's always somebody else and they always start a fight with you. >> Yeah, I can't help it. Oh, can I go over to Scott's house for a while? Me and a couple friends are going to meet there. Then we're going to go bowling. >> Scott's house. I don't know. Maybe you ought to stay home tonight. You see, >> there you go again. It's always no. You never let me do anything. >> Look, I don't want to hear any more back talk from you. How you expect me to grow up if you treat me like a little kid? Oh, you never listen to me anyway. Oh, what do you I'm getting out of here. >> See, hope you're satisfied. So much for your problem solving. >> Well, you sure do have a lot of problems with your dad. >> You saw what happened. >> But Mike, you didn't use any of the steps in problem solving. You got angry and lost control, just like in the library. >> You're so smart. You got all the answers. So, you tell me what to do. >> How about keeping cool and take this one step at a time. Start again at the first step. Identify the problem. You never checked out why he was going to say no, did you? >> No. I don't know. He never told me. >> You never found out. Mike, you can't solve the problem if you don't understand the reason. What chance you had of finding out was gone when you started to yell. You never finished the first step. >> Yeah, I guess you're right. Can't remember the last time I solved a problem with my dad by yelling. But what else can I do? >> After telling him in a calm voice what you want, check out his feelings and reasons. If you listen to him, he might listen to you. Then think of some ideas that might work. Evaluate them and pick the best one. Check it out with your dad. You might be surprised. >> That makes sense. One more try. Uh, hey, Dad. I'm sorry I he started yelling at you. I think there's a misunderstanding and I want to check it out. All right. >> What do you want now? >> Well, I really do want to go over to Scott's house and meet with the guys. They're going to leave in a couple minutes. So, what do you think? >> I said no. I don't want you coming home that far by yourself. >> Oh, you don't want me walking home alone? Is that it? >> Yes. That's why you can't go. >> I have an idea. What if I have Scott's dad drive me home? Then I wouldn't be walking home alone. >> Well, what if he says no? What if he can't do it? >> I'll talk to Scott and get back to you. I'm sure his dad won't mind. >> Okay, we'll see then. >> Didn't you like the roller coaster? Yeah, when the lights went off. >> Jenny, can I use a phone? It's real important. >> Oh, that was great. I didn't I didn't like that. >> Can I please use a phone, Jenny? >> Really? >> Why is it always me? >> No one ever said problem solving was easy, Mike. It's just better. Heat. Heat. [Music] Hey, [Music] hey, hey.