Social Development (1950)

[Music] [Applause] the Jones family arriving at the beach for the summer greet their old friends the Browns and this is Linda what a lovely baby she is she's got her mommy's brown eyes hasn't she she is a wonderful baby but she do doesn't know what this is all about do you the Browns and the Joneses are interested in each other's children they've watched them play together each summer since they were born they've noticed the differences each year as the children grow through different states for you all day well well Sandy Brown my how you've grown the children are glad to see each other too they don't know it but the way they play together during these years is important to their future happiness old friendships are renewed Pat hasn't seen bordy for a whole year but that doesn't make any difference you just pick up where you left off oh boy bare feet and new friendships are made it doesn't matter whether they've met before the important thing is what is she doing now the Browns and the Jones children and their friends are perfectly normal children let's see how they feel about other people as they grow up Little Sandy who is one and a half likes to be near people but he plays happily by himself for hours just enjoying his own power of moving things around experimenting he is interested in other babies but he doesn't know how to say how do you do in a grownup way this is how he establishes contact it's not dislike of the victim it's another [Music] experiment Sandy come here he's beginning to assert his individuality psychologists call it negativism [Music] watch it Mrs Brown getting angry just makes the situation worse because then everybody's angry insistence on obedience at this age is a sure way to develop a future negative [Applause] [Music] behavior I'd rather have this age they can't get away from you that's the age all right you put them down and they stay there and they can't talk either I get so tired of hearing mommy get me this Mommy I want that you don't talk like that do you oh she's at the shy age isn't she don't be shy Linda let Francis see your smile yes Linda likes people especially if she knows that Mommy is right with her it's fun to be able to do just what the big people do two is an age of parallel play they like to be near other children but they don't really play with them Susie has discovered that she can do all kinds of things by herself and she is completely occupied Jay is very busy too if there is any exchange it's likely to be pretty primitive by about three there is a better understanding of how to play together especially if there are enough toys to go around Rody Jones who is three has mastered enough speech so so that he can play with other children without grabbing and pushing at this age sex religion and social status are unimportant kids are fun and it doesn't matter how much money their parents have or what color their skin is make believe play becomes increasingly important three or four-year-old go beyond just pretending to be other people or animals they begin to use anything they find around to create imaginary situations such as boats made of cardboard boxes three is a delightful age but nevertheless three is the Peak age for quarreling there's a scrap every few minutes and they're not fooling but it usually only lasts about 30 seconds the preschooler doesn't hold a grudge lunch time come along Ry no playing play is important at this age routine matters like eating and sleeping can always wait Ry Lunch is ready come along but at about 3 he begins to conform to other people's wishes Mrs Jones is thankful that Rody has passed the no no stage when he refused to do everything but her thankfulness may be shortlived all right that's enough Gren Gren stop that Gren Don't splash mommy you see what I mean you won't enjoy it very much down here I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with Gren he's simply terrible won't do a thing I tell him to I had the same trouble with Pat at that age don't you remember two years ago he was the worst child on the beach Norm says I'm too easy on him I spank him often enough but nothing seems to have any effect P you seem to get over it he's not too bad now it seems to me that most fouryear olds are impossible that's what a great many parents of four-year-olds think the four is active to say the least his play makes sense to him but to adults nearby it may seem unreasonable and annoying he has more muscular control and he loves to show it off in fact showing off is often one of his favorite sports the four is usually a truly social being there is still a great deal of Play Between the Sexes but tradition has begun to Bear down and girls begin to be girls by five they are even better organized and they like to play with others of their own level of ability their play becomes more sensible to adults the unreasoning aggression of the earlier years Fades into the dawning of the competitive spirit leadership begins to show size age in relation to the group and intelligence all count the leader must win the confidence of his friends and then retain his position by starting new games and providing Pleasant experiences for the gang a child who has not played with Children of his own age may have difficulty in making adjustments that the others have made earlier because he doesn't know how to give and take he may be the butt of teasing or if he's bigger he may try to assert himself by bullying the smaller children it's better if he learns to play with kids when he's little Pat Jones is six now and he belongs to a Gang family and immediate neighbors are not as important as they were the gang dominates what he wears and even how he wears it it influences what he thinks and the way he speaks about this age most parents think that their child has fallen under the evil influence of a neighbor's child and the neighbor very likely thinks the same thing but while Pat has achieved his place in the group mother is still very important he is at the pushpull age when he wants to move out into the wider world but yet he feels the tug of home now Mrs Jones has a chance to help him feel that he can be a proper member of the gang and yet not let down the standards of the Jones family gangs develop among both sexes but at this age the Gang has not yet become formal there is much dissension within the ranks accusations of cheating tattling Whispering enemies one moment can be booom friends the next during these years the thing we call popularity becomes well established it depends on many things appearance is important but friendliness enthusiasm and adaptability count for a great deal usually it is related to the amount of outgoing energy that the child expends the popular child is not necessarily the prettiest nor the best but she is outstanding in some way among children hidden virtues remain hidden although the quiet child May really be happier than the favorite at the opposite pole is the child who has no friends perhaps she is different from the crowd too intelligent or too dull or she may be insecure because of overprotective parents or because of an unfortunate experience with people again there's the Avid Reader who gets more excitement from books than from social contacts and there's the child who is so busy with his own interests that he hasn't time for other children there are so many things to do why bother with other people Wendy would you look after pat if I let him go to the pier to swim I should he won't if you can't look out himself he doesn't need to go on I'm going over to nais what do you do with a child like that you won't believe it but she's always had a very nice disposition I know exactly how you feel Jane is just as bad always making scenes and criticizing the rest of the family sometimes I think the older they get the worse they are patience mothers of 9-year-olds they're reaching the prin princess stage it's true that their most Charming manners and their demonstrations of affection are usually save for outside of home if they're in the mood they can be Angelic and helpful but often their family life is full of conflicts mothers must be very understanding to let them have their heads and yet give them the guidance that they need but there is confid in the knowledge that they will soon reach the leveling off period that usually comes with adolescence the child and her teens can enjoy the family more and can enter into a group of friends with less intense quarreling or taking sides Mrs Jones and Mrs Brown like most mothers watch with love and anxiety while their children grow up they know that one of the hardest tasks of this growing up is to make the social adjustments that are necessary for happy living in a world of complicated Human Relationships Linda is a self-centered little person interested only in her own feelings in a few short years she will stand on the threshold of adolescence will she be able to face the confusing inner urges and the outward pressures of society with the understanding help of her parents she will if like Rody she finds a happy relationship with them based on mutual respect for each other's wishes if like Pat she accepts the Friendship of her contemporaries and contributes her share to it and if she does all this without submerging her own individuality she will reach the trying teens with a good Prospect of Happiness Ahead [Music]