Marriage (1971)

[Music] Hey, Sam. Have you seen my hair cream? It's on the dresser. What? I said it's on the dresser. No, it isn't. I You can't see it anywhere. Get a move on, will you? We're only going to Larry and Joe. It's not a Hollywood premiere. I [Music] love you. [Music] [Music] Hey. Hey. Hey. Let's go, Sandy. So yourself. I'm ready. Worth waiting for lovers. Always a show, a e Sandy. Larry's tongue is supposed to hang out a mile and Joe's supposed to look greeneyed with envy. The high school beauty queen still has to prove she's the honey that draws the bees. Well, you didn't marry me for my housekeeping. Score one for your side. Look, Larry and Joe are sure to ask why we didn't make their wedding. So, what are we going to tell them? Why, not the truth. But you wouldn't let me buy a new outfit for the occasion. Cuz we couldn't afford it. And you know, it wouldn't be so bad if you'd settle for some reasonably priced dress. But no, no, not the not the glamour queen. She's got to have the whole works. Purse, shoes, the hats, the gloves, and the dress. Oh, don't be so uptight. Leave it to me. I'll figure out something. Now remember, if they ask us why we weren't at the wedding, we'll just tell them that we had promised to spend the weekend with your boss and some other people. Okay. Okay. Well, there's not much furniture yet, but at least you don't have to sit on the floor. I told Joe all we needed was a couple of pillows on the floor. I'd pretend I was the chic, and she could be the royal favorite, but she wouldn't go for it. Want to tell anyone? Yes, please. Thank you. Well, here's to the newlyweds. Let's wait until the others do here and then we can all toss them together. Well, it's not much yet, but Joe and I figure we can pick up a chair here and a lamp there. We've decided we want to get some good stuff, so we're willing to wait until we have the money. It'll take time, but we weren't as fortunate as you were. Yeah, we were pretty lucky. All right. Sy's parents are just great. Well, they insisted on buying all our basic furniture. Of course, I didn't want them to, but uh I'm getting along with them so well, I could hardly say no. Yes, they're just swell. I guess we really are lucky to have them looking out for us. Yes. Yes, mother. Of course. No, everything's fine. We'll let you know if we can come. Okay. A bass. Who is that? Now, what does she want? We want to know if we'd like to spend the weekend with him at the cottage. And what did you tell him? He said I'd ask you. Oh, for God's sake. Can't we ever spend a weekend alone without your parents? Between your busy bloody mother trying to find out if I'm mistreating you and your old man who gives me advice on everything from how to handle my paycheck to changing the spark plugs in my car, I'm going around the bend. Sandy, you didn't sound like that when they gave us the chair you're sitting in. We didn't even have much to say about that, did we? If I thought that a set of furniture would entitle them to run our lives, I would have thought twice about jumping into holy matrimony. You've sure changed your tune. I'm sick and tired of your parents trying to run our lives. Sy's parents have been a great help. I don't know what we would have done without them. Everything's coming along. I hope you like it. I'm still practicing. Take time. I'm still practicing, too. Larry and I have cut it pretty close on food. Thank goodness we both like casserles and stews. I try to plan a meal so that we can use leftovers. We had a stew last night that wasn't too bad, if I do say so myself. Well, aside from a little pain right about there. Well, you'll get by that stage in a hurry. When are you going to learn to cook? Afraid you're losing your strength, Mr. Fullback. I'm sick of TV dinners. If I wanted frozen food, I would have married an Eskimo. Do you realize how much we spend for this food? The least you can do is learn how to prepare it. I do the best I can. You've just been spoiled, that's all. I'm not the spoiled one. The only thing your mother taught you to do is eat. Well, why don't you cook the meals, Ben? You can eat well without spending a lot of money, can't you? I mean, if you plan carefully and stick to a budget. Sure you can. I mean, it's just a matter of making the most of your money, that's all. If you have any problems, Joe, just give me a ring. I've picked up a few shortcuts. See, honey, they're making it. But say, we haven't seen much of you two in this last year. Since you've been married, in fact. Well, you know how it is, Larry. After you're married, your habits change. We have to spend a lot of time with my customers, entertaining and all that. I never really knew how much time it took to be a good salesman. It doesn't leave us much time to spend with old friends. We'd really like to get together more often, but you know what? Darn's going to get ahead. But we never go anywhere. It's all right for you. Half the time you're out of town. And even when you're in town, you're practically never at home. Oh, come on, Sandy. You know I have to travel in my job. And how many customers do I entertain downtown without taking you along? Oh, big deal. Either I get to sit like a bump in a log while you talk business for hours, or I wind up in a wrestling match with some creep who figures part of the business deal is a little fun and games with the salesman's wife. Well, if you think that's my idea of a good time, I've got news for you. Well, you don't have to come along, you know. I mean, you're the one that stays at home and squables about never going out. I mean, what is it with you anyway, Sandy? What I said was we never go anywhere. Even on weekends, you're off fishing with the boys at your boss's cottage or at my parents' cottage. And now you say you want to take a week of your vacation to go fishing. So, what's the matter with that? Well, why can't we just take a week off and go somewhere? That's all. Because we can't afford it. That's why. You know, I want to buy a new car. Darn. We've been through this so many times before. We don't need a new car. The one we've got is only a year old. Yeah, and it's a tub. Nobody drives a sixcylinder compact anymore. I need something bigger. Something with more power. Something will move out when I step on it. I got it picked out already. A V8 with four on the floor. We're hanging on to the money for that. But we can Forget it, Sandy. A vacation is out and that's that. What do you say, Andy? Hi, Marian. Sorry we're late, Mary. I had to work. Oh, that's okay. This is no big deal. We were just sitting around talking. Come on in. Thank you. Would you care to sit here, Mary? No, thank you. I think I'll just split up the ideal couple. The ideal couple? Sure. All of us girls were so jealous at your wedding. You were the most popular girl in school. Then to top it all off, you had to go marry the best looking boy in school. Well, it just wasn't fair. Andy's just as good-looking now. Must be nice to know that you've still got it. Watch it, pal. You better start getting ugly or you're going to have problems. Well, you know how it is, Larry. Once you've got it, I've been beating them off with brooms all my life. Really, Sandy? Everybody thought that it was just too much luck for one person. Hey, Sandy, get out of the way. Are you going to stay glued to that set all weekend? The least you could have done was shave. Oh, come on, Sandy. The Lions are playing the Packers. They always put on a great show. Leave those things alone. We're not going anywhere. Do we have to be going somewhere? Would you like another drink, darling? Yes, please. Thanks, hun. Excuse me. I certainly hope Larry still waits on me like that after a year. I think he's starting to slip already. Just look for the signs, Joe. I'm sure Larry is just as thoughtful and tenative as Dawn. I'm thirsty, too. Would you like to get me a glass of milk, please? What's the matter with you? Break your leg or something? Now that Mary and Andy are here, let's have that toast for the newlyweds. I give you the grooviest newlyweds in town, Larry and Joanne. And may they live happily ever after, or whatever you're supposed to do. You know, if it hadn't have been for Don and Sandy, we would have waited. Joe and I hope we'll be just as happy as you are. [Music] Hey, hey, hey.