In the Life: Ep. 1802, "Lifesavers"

coming up on in the life community outrage leads to equal justice a conversation about the spirit of organizing and the joy of teaching it is the most satisfying professional moment in life and from stage to screen to lifesaver fighting teen suicide one phone call at a time all this and more on in the life documenting the people and issues shaping the gay experience in the life is funded in part by the H van a meringue and foundation arcus foundation new Paul foundation the estate of richard w island and these funders and by the annual support in the life members like you your mom and dad I don't want you to think I haven't given this a lot of thought but I have I tried to cure myself but nothing worked don't think it's your fault it just happened please give all my Diana Ross records and tapes that Christy monstera who happens to love Diane as much as I do and please if it's possible play in this love at my funeral it's my absolute fav and don't cry too much it would have been a skillion times worse if I had lived your loving son Trevor each year in America over 32,000 families lose loved ones to suicide one of the leading causes of death among 15 to 24 year olds gay youth are four times more likely to attempt suicide than their straight peers your every breath and I take your every step I'm tonight young people at risk and those who are lending a hand and an ear to save them two thousand eight marks the 10-year anniversary of The Trevor Project a crisis hotline designed specifically for LGBT youth at risk offering support 24 hours a day 365 days a year the origins of The Trevor Project lie and a little theater in Manhattan's Lower East Side in the short play word of mouth writer and actor James lezyne drew from his own experiences to tell a story of a gay teen suicide the play later became a short film simply called Trevor Hey hi I'm James Levine and welcome to my place this is my office desk and this is where the trevor project all began at the time i was putting together the material for this show that i was doing cove word of mouth that particular day i was listening to the radio and i was listening to a report on NPR about gay teen suicide and at the time it was thirty-three percent of all gay teen suicides that they know of we're attributable to homosexuality I got the idea to actually write something about gay teen suicide that was personal so i sat down i started writing there was an incredible opportunity to tell a particular story about a particular boy and you know i drew on a lot of my own experiences of growing up I grew up on the other side of the George Washington Bridge and a little town in New Jersey quilt hasbrouck heights I'm gonna take you now to the place where trevor was first performed as a stage play okay so this is the famous la mama theater and this is where I first performed word of mouth and Trevor and we're going to go inside Wow the incredible thing about la mama is that it's like a piece of New York history it's where like sort of theater began in like 60s the amazing thing is it hasn't changed at all Emily if it's possible play endless love at my funeral my absolute age don't cry too much it would have been like a billion things works if I can live your loving huh there's only you he oh Oh i met james the scene because i went to see his show word of mouth down at La MaMa and it truly was one of the best one-man shows I'd ever seen I just knew that I had been incredibly touched by the peace and that I found myself laughing and crying at the same time which isn't an experience I get that often the light bulb that went off in my head was I have to call Randy stone mandy was a casting director and I thought he's got to see this guy he's got to see this piece it happened that Randy stone was in town the next day he came to see the show and Randy walked out and I could tell he had been crying and had been his moved by it as I had and Randy came out and said to me immediately you need to turn this into a film the thing about Trevor it sort of seemed like a miracle it came together so quickly and then we got the call The Trevor had been nominated cat award but they weren't only nominated they won the Oscar in 1995 for best short film and when it happened it was almost like it okay well that's amazing and that kind of an experience when you hear your name on the Oscars I think there's this sense that it just becomes very unreal we sold it to HBO and we got Ellen DeGeneres to do amazing back wraparound presentation hi I'm Ellen DeGeneres and I would like you to watch this next movie this was right at the point that Ellen had first come out so she was white hot she was on the cover of everything it really was at that point that we knew the film was going to be on air that the trevor project was born i quickly did research and realized there was no one who had a hot line that was focused on and dedicated to kids who were gay or christening it just seemed like we had to do it the first call center we hooked up with a an existing suicide prevention helpline in LA and now it's you know we've been able to actually have call centers at the Trevor offices in LA in Washington DC there is a call center here which was opened this past year in memory of Randy stone who died last year Trevor helpline this is anish the Randy stone call center we're here in lower Manhattan in the financial district so we have room for four of our counselor stations were here twenty-four-seven that we're the nation's only suicide and crisis intervention helpline for LGBT you and questioning you I have been a counselor on the trevor project since September of 2007 I wanted to be a counselor for The Trevor Project because I grew up in a very small town and I felt that I was alone and different as I grew older I really felt that I wanted to be a support system for other kids who felt that way growing up what's it like to be a counselor I can tell you that no two phone calls are the same every youth that reaches out to us has something different going on in their life but one of the clot of the common themes are that they're feeling alone they're feeling scared and they're feeling isolated a good counselor can help ameliorate some of those feelings that they're having we are answering over twelve thousand calls a year from youth all across the country most of our calls come from right here in this region here the Midwest and southern parts of the country I would say our average age of our caller is 15 what motivates me to do this and to give myself to these kids is the fact that they're just kids you know they deserve to have a wonderful healthy happy life we have an annual fundraising event here in new york city called Trevor New York we're going to be honoring Alan for his superior work in film and television we're celebrating our 10th anniversary year and we've got lots of entertainment idina menzel Sandra Bernhard it's a little bit of music a little bit of comedy Alec mapa so it's a great evening lots of stars and celebrities come out for it the Colin Piggins foundation gives out three awards every year to youth who have triumphed over adversity these are gay teens and so at our event we are more than honored to be able to bestow those awards out they come with a ten-thousand-dollar grant to each individual our final youth honoree is Perry Shelton the youngest poet ever featured on HBO's Russell Simmons presents death poetry receiving this award is exceptional it makes me feel like all this work that has been done that the Creator has used me for it's being listened to them my mom doesn't even know that I've had thoughts of suicide and it's obviously because I never told her young people need somebody to talk to and that's all The Trevor Project and people who are associated with will listen I hear a lot of pain from a lot of our callers but what constantly makes me feel so amazing is that there are so many great volunteers who take time out of their lives to answer these phone calls and talk to young people who are feeling so much in their lives great okay I really believe deep in my heart and always have believed that art has an enormous capacity to change people's lives and to open their hearts and that's what I wanted to be a part of I've definitely decided to live through tomorrow Alan van coppell executive director of the Empire State pride agenda New York statewide LGBT civil rights and advocacy organization recently sat down with labor leader Randi Weingarten the newly elected president of the 1.4 million member American Federation of Teachers tonight Weingarten and van coppell discussed the intersection of the labor movement and the LGBT rights movement creating safe school environments and the joy of teaching last year october two thousand seven you come to the sheridan in New York the Empire State pride agenda dinner in the middle of accepting an award you say that my sexual orientation was not as common to knowledge as it probably is tonight why did you decide to come out then it was only when I realized I think that I could be viewed as a labor leader in my own right and that talking about my sexuality would actually be a way of expanding other civil rights I realized that I needed to actually be a role model on the leader in this area by using myself and a lot of what I feared and what others fear just didn't materialize so I get to ask you a question what's the next front here for espa what's the next frontier in civil rights the two groups I think about most are young people write some of the folks that you're working what exactly no forty percent of the homeless kids on the street tonight identify as LGBT kids coming out in an earlier age we have done virtually nothing as a community to protect those kids when they come out when they are kicked out of their homes or harassment schools and turn on the street 24 Street work or for drugs and then end up in a criminal system which you know we know isn't that helpful to them the other thing I think about our senior citizens who this generation of seniors out their whole life now going into an assisted living or nursing facility only to go back into the closet because the folks who are caring for them have no cultural competency whatsoever in gay and lesbian life's and so they're abused and victimized in the nursing homes and I don't think that ever gets public attention and I think those are some of the issues we have to be working on when we actually work on these kind of issues together like the dignity of all students act that we worked on together between the Union and esper when we work on these things together we bring the collective clout of several different communities to bear on an issue and we're successful and effective in the political stream when we do it together we always say that if it's only LGBT people talking about LGBT issues we lose right and so when we ask everybody who are the most important actors in your state capital and chances are there people of faith labor leaders and unions and corporations and if you could either win those folks over to your side right and activate them to be working for you and using their cloud for you or neutralize them then you have a better shot at winning july two thousand eight right Newsweek cover about Lawrence King 15 years old killed in his classroom a story about the kids coming out as gay gender identity and how schools can protect those kids how safe are kids who are and thinking about their gender identity and their sexual orientation in schools you would hope that schools would be the safest places possible for kids and that schools would always be this incredible safety net for kids and by and large that's that's true but then when we have situations like this we realize we have so much more to do part of the reason why I push both on a local and national level for tolerance education I know that the ad council and glisan is going to be doing a big ad campaign I think as we speak about educating people about how words hurt like if when is when you say to kids it's so you're so gay or it's so gay that sends all the wrong messages do you like this top so gay really yeah it's totally gay you know you really shouldn't say that play what well say that something's gay when you mean it's bad it's insulting so we got a lot more work to do in this country what role do teachers play in all this I always get to this issue thinking and talking about tolerance and respect because it's there is an environment which is respectful and tolerant regardless of whether people look the same as you or act the same as you were love the same people as you love if you get two basic tolerance and respect then we don't have situations of kids tragically being killed because of who they are whether it's matthew shepard or whether it's this young man and ultimately that is part of our obligation as school teachers to Joy teach I love teaching what did you really want about I mean it was both frustrating and exhilarating at the same time I often say that teachers are a combination of Martin Luther King jr. Albert Einstein Gandhi and Tony Soprano all rolled in together because that's all the skills that you need as a school teacher but it's but what I loved about teaching is kids are so incredibly resilient and they are willing to be pushed if you can figure out the right strategies you know your content well because you can't you know kids know if you if it is no funny kids no a phony but when you're real with them and when you push them to be the best they can be and when they get it it is the most satisfying professional moment in life when you see that when you see a sparkle in a kid's I when you see you know one of your kids making that connection there's nothing better and that's what I loved about teaching jimeson yes I love did you go back at some point i would i would love to go back at some point but teaching five periods a day was the most exhausting job I ever had it just drains all of your energy out of you when you're doing it at at the level of all those teachers do it at but it is the best most fulfilling life's work than anybody could do make a difference in the life of the child what do you envision Alan van coppell is going to be doing five years from now i know i'd like to be a father tell you the truth you know I used to think I want to be a teacher too in some ways although after the description of how exhausting it is i'm not exactly sure that's the first thing I'd be jumping into I don't know it's my my honest answer I know I don't want to run for office that's that one thing I'm positive of I really learned that there is so much change that can be made when you're not an elected official this it's so exciting to me to get people who think that politics is up here my uh ha light bulb moment is when you go to a community of folks and say you have so much more power than you think you have right that elected official is not up here they're here and you actually get to drive their agenda so as we come to the end of this conversation but as I look forward to other conversations with you some parting thoughts for us one of the one of the major lessons I've learned in life was that you you can actually get things done for people through the political process you can get things done in the American democracy as frustrating as it is if you have collective action we can actually make this country a better place we can make it a more tolerant place we can make it a more respectful place we can make it a place where people have the economic dignity respect they so need and a place where they can be whoever they want to be and that is the lesson that I have learned and frankly you have helped teach it to me thank you and thank you and your members of the aft and the UFT for being such strong advocates for Safe Schools and for marriage equality and so thank you randy weingarten thank you alan clam cabin in 2008 the national ad council in partnership with glisten the gay lesbian and straight education network launched a campaign to bring awareness to the challenges LGBT youth face in schools among their peers these ads mark the first time the national ad council has produced public service announcements addressing LGBT issues can you check out this ship right don't say that what don't say that something is gay when you mean that something as dumb or stupid it's insulting it's like if I thought this pepper shaker was stupid and I said man this pepper shakers sold sixteen-year-old boy with the cheesy mustache just saying when you say that's so gay do you realize what you say knock it off our next reel-to-reel chronicles police lieutenant Laurel Hester's tireless end of life journey to pass along benefits to her life partner Stacy director Cynthia Wade captured how people passionately stood beside Laurel and Stacie and her Academy award-winning documentary short free held I got my pension most of the officers and the prosecutor's office got their pensions my wife will get my pension how about laurels mention she spent 20-some years protecting the citizens Ocean County I first heard about lieutenant Laurel Hester by reading an article in a local paper and there was an article that said that she was going to be protesting her elected officials decision not to allow her to pass her pension to her domestic partner he decided to go down to this town meeting just to sort of see what it was about why can't you pay the domestic partnership pension benefits i I just I made a loss well you're asking the wrong question it's not a matter of can you pay like we have money in the bank we can pay lots of things it's a question of okay it's a question of are you going to pay it I started shooting and this extraordinary community meeting unfolded its you have within 10 minutes I realized this is it this is my next film I have to pursue this I'm gonna have to drop a lot of other things in my life to make this film but this is the right story to follow I introduced myself to Laurel and Stacie at the end of that meeting and within three days we were in the hospital in the beginning I was going down there spending a day coming back it became very clear though that to be able to tell the story I needed to tell the story from the inside it needed to be a love story first and a political story second so very quickly I started spending nights in Laurel a stacy's guest bedroom I guess almost you always walk an ethical line as a documentary filmmaker walking into somebody's life particularly if it's a very difficult time in their life if you're going to tell the story of a relationship you need to be able to see those late-night moments when one person is taking care of another person last year I was diagnosed with cancer lung cancer stage 3 I gave Laurel and Stacie a camera to give them the opportunity to film their own lives and to be part of the storytelling and for it to be a collaboration between the three of us my priority with the time that I have left his to spend as much of it as I can what's the woman I love and that's Stacey she's everything to me and she has been everything to me for last five years I think the fight to protect Stacey and to make sure the Stacey saw justice absolutely was keeping Laurel alive rumor has it that the freeholders of call for special emergency meeting on Wednesday because of all this tremendous pressure they've been under it was a phone call made by the governor if she's there in person before the freeholders it might help to change their mind I would like to make a motion to pass a resolution to expand pension benefits to county employees under provisions of the law we talked about how her story could potentially make a difference to other same-sex couples and one of the things that we discussed was that by the time the film would actually be done and launched it would be an election year we've screened across the country we screened internationally we've won a significant amount of of awards which is great but ultimately how do you how do you take that as a tool and then turn it into something that's really gonna make an impact in a change we're just average people that have a home and a couple dogs and pay our taxes and we just wanted everything to be equal thank you for watching in the life to sign up for monthly air date alerts or to download episodes 24-7 please go to our website at in the life TV org or call one eight hundred six to seven on TV we'd love to hear from you I'm Michael Billy thanks for tuning in and please join us next month the world has gone mad today in goods bad today you like swype today and days like today enough guys today that win the prize today are silly jiggle balls and no I'm not a great romancer I know that you're bound to answer when I anything great again in the life is funded in part by the H van a meringue and foundation arcus foundation new Paul foundation the estate of richard w island and these funders and by the annual support in the life members like you you