Childbirth: Sue's Story

[Music] [Applause] [Music] I found that people have been very good at handing out advice and telling me what I ought to do and what I ought not to do and telling you all about things that went wrong in their pregnancies that you don't tend to hear about the good things and the nice things that happen one thing that particularly worried me was people kept saying to me oh you're not getting very big you don't look as though you're as many months pregnant as you are and I was very concerned about this so I asked my doctor that she said that everything was perfectly all right and it was just the fact that some people gain more fluid than others and some people put more weight on but I think is important when people do say these things to you you don't take any notice of them or you ask somebody who knows right so your blood pressure is nice and normal good now we going to feel your tummy just can you feel your dress up for a second just going feel your tummy that's 34 weeks that's nice and normal that's about right isn't it okay the baby is all there that's lovely now we'll listen to baby's heart all right it's lovely so it's pounding away nicely would you like to listen to him oh yes please I got to put this on your ears how much years I used to it right you just hear little p p p p p going on is faster than it comes oh yeah I can hear it nicly oh that's a baby's heart gosh exciting so this evening we're going to talk about breastfeeding now have any of you thought about breastfeeding yes we we we thought I mean for one thing we thought it does seem a lot more natural than using a bottle to feed after all the mother's milk is designed for the baby where was cow's milk isn't so that seemed one thing that was better didn't it really it's more convenient and it is cheaper also protects a baby against diseases as well I've got here tonight two families who are both breastfeeding their babies Caroline you breastfed neari for how long for nine months for nine months and Tamar is how old 10 days 10 days um why did you feed Nami for nine months it's a long time because I enjoyed it and with Tamar how often are you feeding her when she wants it really so is that any specific length of time between feeds no sometimes it's as much as 4 hours and sometimes only half an hour and do you feed her for any length of time no I just feed her as much as she wants and then I stop and win her and then if she wants more she has more so Caroline's feeding Tam are as often as Tamar wants to be fed and for as long as Tamar wants to be fed yes now I expect some of the fathers here tonight have decided to be in the labor Ward some of you are perhaps a bit undited and I want to reassure you that you can feel completely free to come and go you don't at any time have to sign on the dotted line and stay through it all you can walk in and out and nobody feels that's strange you see so it's up to you whether you come or not now if you are going to be there another thing I want to say is that you can do your own thing don't feel that there's a certain way for the father behave in labor and uh it's got to be like that and this was very much brought home to me the other day CU I was with in our labor Ward and I was in two adjacent rooms with two girls that I knew very well well one of them had her husband nearly in bed with her was cuddling her and whispering in her ear and comforting her and the other girl her husband was right in a distant Corner reading lucky gym I thought this was a bit strange but the girl seemed quite happy and the next day I said to her did he ever get any nearer to you so she said oh no she said he's not that sort of Chap and she said it really comforted me to see him just being himself in that corner with his book actually my husband wasn't planning to come at all oh that's fine it's just his choice and uh you don't want to persuade him do you because then youd worry about him no and you will have someone with you all the time in labor if he's not going to be there and then I expect he'll be around the corner and come in as soon as the baby's born will he yes that's fine now the men if you're going to be there in the labor Ward it's most important that you've learned what she's learned in the classes so that you can help her and that's particularly the relaxation if you haven't already learned how to relax please go home and learn tonight because that's the way you're going to help her most the other thing you can help her with is by rubbing her back during first stage contractions can I just try on you if you turn with your back to your Chap and the way to do it is with a flat of your hand straight up and down the length of her spine that can be very soothing during first stage contraction so can you try that nice firm rubbing and she ought to like it if she's liking it you're probably doing it the right way fine I've been trying to help as much as I can because Sue has all the more unpleasant sides of the pregnancy when I first got pregnant I was very sick in the morning and Ian used to be super Eed to get out and bring me my breakfast and then i' stay in bed for about half an hour then I get up and go to school I mean I wouldn't have managed without him cuz of course my mom wasn't around the corner and could put around and help me it seemed only fair that I should take some of the responsibility um as regards making things easier for Sue um easing some of the burden there then when I used to get home from school I used to be quite tired so I just used to flake out on the couch and then even came home and cook dinner so I was very lucky there's your coffee dear oh lovely that's not too strong oh no it looks fine that'ss good gosh I'm ready for this yes you will be have you been tired today no not too bad had a long sleep this afternoon did you yeah oh that's nice how long was that oh about 2 hours oh that's nice did you enjoy it this evening yeah it was interesting wasn't it don't think I'll remember how to do his exercises though well we'll have to practice w't we yeah you probably remember them better than me oh well we'll see we could have a g them later couldn't we when we go to bed yes that's a good idea yeah we'll try that can't go to sleep yet oh we're going to do those relaxation oh put close back [Applause] okay you know if you're going to be any use to me when I'm in labor you've got to know what you're doing so you can help me okay then is this like we did tonight yeah right right pull your shoulders down stop register the new position move your arms s a bit away from your body stretch stop stretch your fingers so they're long and hard stop register the new position is that nice M it's lovely that's good you want to move over a bit and let me in now all right and you can have a go on me [Music] oh