AV Geeks 16mm Lunch 4-10-2026

[music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [bell] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] >> I corps Roma capital Julio amplissimi imperii Dominus totius [music] est princeps Traianus Ille per legiones dominationem exercet. Olim viri nobiles a populo electi regebant. Sed nunc princeps regit solus et supra leges est. Princeps divites Romanos eligit qui iura administrant. Hi fere nullam potestatem habent sed amant honores. Erotium et elegantiam vitae. Hi pauci multas divitias acquirunt, superbi et arrogantes sunt. Maxima pars Romanorum pauperes sunt. Quae condicio periculosa est. Magnas divitias consequimur per commercium. Multae res ex omnibus provinciis veniunt. Forum plenum sunt mercibus. Multi ibi laborant, mercatores, vendentes, servi. Matronae cibos diversos emunt si pecuniam habent. Vel vir togam novam vel fictilia in usum domesticum. Ecce scriba qui epistulas et documenta scribit. Pauci enim legere et scribere scimus. Urbs Roma magna et pulchra est. Sed inter homines est maxima diversitas. Habemus splendidum forum. Sed etiam squalidos vicos. In illis per multi pauperes et miseri habitant. Viae angustae sunt. Condiciones vitae pessimae. Est periculum ex igni et casu domorum. Difficile est meliora invenire, labor enim et pecunia desunt. Tertia pars Romanorum cibum a magistratibus accipiunt. Frumentum parva pecunia. Si haec non dantur, qui fame laborantes pacem et salutem rei publicae turbare possunt. Extra urbem equos exercent ad certamina in Circo Maximo. Magistratus enim ludos et spectacula pro populo habent. Primo solum cursus equorum habebantur. Sed nunc viri certant usque ad mortem. Similes bestiarum fiunt. Romani humanissimi sunt. Multos tamen servos habent. Quod mirum est. Apud nos homines in duo genera dividuntur. In liberos et servos. In hac urbe tertia pars hominum sunt servi. Alii agros colunt, alii metalla exercent. Alii qui eruditi sunt pueros docent. Hi meliorem vitam habent. Alii in domibus divitum laborant. Pauci domini crudeles sunt. Sed plurimi sunt benigni et boni. Servi iura civium non tenent quia vix homines putantur. Soli viri Romani non feminae cives sunt. Vel nativitate vel dono principis. Hic in Basilica Iulia et in provinciis cives Romani causam dicere possunt coram conquisitoribus. Reus putatur innocens donec probetur nocens. Hoc est ingenium nostrum, legibus vitas hominum regere. Specta in foro templa deorum Iovis Vestae Castoris et Pollucis ornata simulacris deorum. Eorum cultus ad nos a Graecis, Etruscis, aliis venit. Sed nunc di nostri sunt. Apud antiquos Romanos omnia opera et loca ad deos dedicata sunt. Sed nunc di antiqui minus valent et multi Romani in rebus >> [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] >> All right. Enough of that. Um yeah, that that whole film was in Latin. That was awesome. We have a couple of those um where they take a normal educational film and then dub it in Latin so that uh kids taking Latin in uh school have something to watch and to practice with. Okay, this next film is a Centron film. This is reporting and briefing, part of this communications series. Enjoy. >> [music] [music] [music] >> Afternoon. I have an appointment at 3:30 to see the group vice president. >> [music] [music] [music] >> Hey, Bob. Hi, Neil. You, too? Yep. She wants to see you, too? Yeah. What do you think she wants? Well, I don't know. Gentlemen, you can go right in. She's expecting you. Well, we'll know in a minute. Good morning. Good morning. >> Good to see you. I'm sure both of you know that the annual stockholders meeting is scheduled for the end of this month. The chairman has expressed his concern over a couple of uh sticky questions he may have to field from some of our unhappy stockholders. Well, the chairman's concern is our concern. How can we help? I was getting to that. I have volunteered to answer any questions from the floor dealing with declining sales and profitability in our consumer line, and with any challenges as to the effectiveness of our community relations program. And you want us to dig up the ammunition for you. Exactly. Now, time's short, so I'll need your briefing at 10:00 a.m. next Monday morning. I need both facts and figures from you. Any questions? Bob? Neil? She only wants a briefing. I thought we might be in for a hatchet job. Yeah, but Monday doesn't give us much time to prepare. Hey, no sweat. I could have given her a briefing right there on the spot. With facts and figures? Ah, she always says that. She just wants the big picture. I can wing it. Yeah, well, we'll see. Catch you Monday morning. Right. Later. We return to Neil and Bob later to see how they get along with their briefing of the vice president. In the military, as in the business world, briefings and reports are routine daily activities. They're also standard procedure in education and in just about any other type of organization. You'll be called upon to give briefings and oral reports hundreds of times during your lifetime. Some will be in formal situations such as this, and some not so formal. And what did he say about your promotion? Well, he said there were three things I had to do to qualify for my own territory. One, I had to take a night school course in accounting. Two, I had to take a speech course. How we getting along here, Kenny? Well, with these bearings out, we're going to have to disassemble the whole thing and uh put the bearings in, and so about 2 and 1/2 days will be about Yes, some reports can be as simple as that. But not all reports and briefings are equally successful. Effective reports are always clear and accurate. It's both the power supply and the steering. It's helpful if the report is also interesting, but don't confuse interest with entertainment. The function of the oral report or briefing is to impart information, not to entertain. You're recognizing it here, the mountains of Finland and Norway in the upper peninsula of Finland, and I remember if you've been asked to brief a group, they're already interested in the subject for its own sake. They want you to give them the facts. Though your presentation may consist of figures, statistics, or technical explanations, they're important and interesting to your listeners, or they wouldn't have asked for the briefing. Let's see how logical, easy-to-follow organization of the material in a report contributes to clarity and interest. The instruments are divided into these four sections. The first section is the rhythm section. The next section is the melodic section. The third section is the horn section. And of course, last, the vocal section. Can you sense the rightness of the organization here? If so, what made it right? Was the flow achieved by separating the material into natural units? Now let's watch two different speakers present oral reports on the same subject in the classroom. The assignment is to report on the accomplishments of a famous American. Listen carefully to see how these two have organized their material. My report was on Theodore Roosevelt. As you probably already know, Theodore Roosevelt was a very famous man. He did a lot of great things. He died in uh 1919. And before that, he was the president of the United States. He traveled all over. Uh many things interested him. Uh he had a lot of talents. A lot of talents. He was a very smart man. He was born in 1858. And I think he was one of the greatest Americans of all time. He died in Ho-hum. This speaker's rambling report lacks structure and direction. It wanders aimlessly from one unconnected generalization to another. And if a report is supposed to convey information, what did you learn about Theodore Roosevelt from this presentation? Let's try another report on the same topic. 60 years, it's probably safe to refer to him as Teddy. But while he was alive, no one would have dared to call him that to his face. For Theodore Roosevelt was truly an awesome human being. Let me try to prove this to you by listing just a few of his accomplishments. Not only was he the youngest president in the history of the United States and a Nobel Peace Prize winner, he was also an author. He wrote literally hundreds of articles and published more books than Ernest Hemingway. He was an adventurer, probably the best known big game hunter in the world. He was a scholar. He was an acknowledged authority on a variety of subjects ranging from post-futurist painting to Hungarian history to Greek drama to political economy. And even while he was in the White House, the National Museum called upon him to identify some rare mammals that their own experts couldn't classify. He was a soldier. He was the daredevil commander of Roosevelt's Rough Riders. And he personally led the charge up San Juan Hill. Much better. Did you notice how this speaker stated her main theme, then amplified and reinforced it by giving example after example? No haphazard organization here. While the first speaker offered only vague and meaningless generalities, uh and he had a lot of talents. A lot of talents. The second speaker presented specific examples and information. Nobel Peace Prize winner. He was also an author. He wrote literally hundreds of articles It seems apparent that presenting specific examples and information adds to both clarity and interest. >> the best known big game hunter in the world. And he was a statesman. What else did you notice about the second speaker's report? Did the visual aids help her achieve both clarity and interest? Check out this speaker's techniques of presenting a factual report. Okay, well, when I pull a driver over to the side of the road and give him one of these, a traffic ticket, he's quite likely to say to me, "Why aren't you out catching criminals?" >> Is this specific? And yet each year, more than six times as many are killed and injured in car accidents as in crime. >> Is this specific? In this county alone last year, there were seven homicides, but 60 traffic deaths. Is this specific? Within the next 12 months, the likelihood that you will become the victim of a personal criminal attack is 1 in 550. Is this specific? Not only does the speaker pile up one specific example after another, but he reinforces them with visual aids. 1 in 550. Within the same 12 months, the likelihood that you will die or be injured in an automobile is 1 in 50. I do not give tickets to drivers who are observing the law. I am catching dangerous criminals. This presentation is well organized and uses visual aids liberally. It rates high in both clarity and interest. But how about accuracy? Did he present concrete facts and figures? Or did his report sound like guesswork? Accuracy is essential to an effective report. So, don't guess. Get the facts. What else can we learn from this speaker? Well, which brings us to the point of the reckless driver. And And it's strange we call them that because reckless drivers have more wrecks than anybody else. >> [laughter] >> Appropriate humor adds interest, but the keyword is appropriate. Dragging in a long funny story unrelated to your subject simply detracts from a report. Use humor, but only if it's appropriate. And that goes for visual aids as well. Consider this use of visual aids. So, as we've seen, brown spiders are extremely dangerous. Their bites can be fatal to children. And they are commonly found right here in our own community. It is imperative that you learn how to identify them. I brought along this photograph of a brown spider to help you identify it. Notice the distinctive markings on the back. Can you see that? There in the back of the room? No, I guess not. No need to dwell on this point. Visual aids must be appropriate. Well, I I should have brought along something larger, I guess. To recap, so far, we've seen that good organization of the material, each having a part in that total sound. specific examples and appropriate visual aids can add clarity and interest to a report. >> He personally led the charge up San Juan Hill. Accuracy is essential. So, don't guess. Get the facts. Now let's rejoin Bob and Neil as they prepare to brief their vice president. Using the criteria we've already learned about effective reporting and briefing, put yourself in her place. You be the boss. You judge their briefings. >> [clears throat] >> Uh we've caught a lot of flak about our community relations program, and all of us who work in that department are beginning to resent it. It's unwarranted and unjustified. Uh we work hard. I put in a lot of extra hours. And so do some of the other people who work in the department. We must put in oh, 10, maybe 20 hours overtime in an average week. And that doesn't cost the stockholders one red cent because we don't get paid extra for it. We're all on salary. No overtime pay. You know, that might be something you could bring up to the chairman. Sort of test the wind, you know? It'd sure help morale around here if we got some overtime pay or compensatory time off for working nights and weekends. Uh where was I? Um Oh. Uh uh one thing we definitely need to bring up is uh is our minority hiring program. That's community relations. Important community relations. Affirmative action. Uh we've hired and recruited a lot of women into responsible positions. And our record of minority hiring is good. There must be oh, well, the exact percentage of increase isn't important, but it's significant. I can vouch for that. Heard enough? gone up dramatically. Let's go on to Bob. I prepared a written report to go along with the briefing. All the documentation of the sources is in here. And this appendix includes copies of all the appropriate graphs, charts, and tables. These bars indicate our production level, sales volume, and profits on all consumer items through the third quarter of this year. These bars indicate those same items for the first three quarters of last year. It appears that our consumer division's productivity, sales volume, and profits will decline seriously this year. But appearances can be deceiving. As this chart indicates, most of our decline occurred during this past quarter. And there are two main reasons for this decline. First, plants were closed down for retooling. Notice that Bob uses a variety of visual aids to introduce, explain, and amplify his main points. As this chart indicates, nine out of 10 of our customers were able to readily accept our new product. That makes the percentage 87.9%. A long detailed statistical report can turn into a confusing jumble unless the speaker finds graphic ways of presenting the figures. Carefully planned graphs and charts not only add variety and interest to the presentation, they give the audience an instant visual representation of trends and relationships. So, our projections show that we'll end the fiscal year just about here. A significant difference over last year. Do you have any questions? Audience? Would you like more detail on any of these points? No, thanks, Bob. I think we got the message. >> [music] >> Well, there's just more and more of those in that series. Um and these are I think probably all shown for communication classes. Um people took in college or at technical school. All right, we've got the third and final reel of uh great radio comedians. We're going to end with that. Uh so, I have a Zoom call at uh 2:00 p.m. So, it might be something that I have to jump on the Zoom call um while this is still going. But, um if that's the case, I'm just going to say, "Hey, it's great. I'm um feeling better every day because of my pinched nerve. It's slowly getting healing. Um try not to overdo it. Try not to schlep a bunch of films, but I am schlepping some. Um but anyways, here's uh the final installment of great radio comedians. Enjoy. Fred Allen's humor was in the tradition of Mark Twain and Will Rogers. So, you can see why he liked this quote by George Bernard Shaw. If you want to tell people the truth, you'd better make them laugh or they'll kill you. One of the most fondly remembered features of the Fred Allen show in the '40s is Allen's Alley. Parker. Parker finish. Hello, Parker. We've reunited in this studio the original members of the Alley to recreate their roles in a script written especially for this show by Harry Bailey, who wrote for Fred Allen in the '40s. The voice of Fred Allen will be impersonated by Al Bernie. Well, it's time for another visit to Allen's Alley. This week, the government announced that it may be necessary to raise the income tax. So, our question for tonight is, "What is your reaction to a possible rise in the income tax?" Here we are at Senator Claghorn's house. I see the senator is home. His team of mules is hitched in the guest room. Well, let's knock. Somebody I say somebody thumped my portal. Claghorn's the name, Senator Claghorn at it. Oh, it's you, son. >> Yes, yes, good evening, Senator. Son, I got no time to be standing here filibustering with you. I'm busier than a one-tooth mouse in a room full of cheddar. The Senate has you hopping, eh? That ain't the half of it, son. This session has the whole Senate upset. Just today in the cloakroom, I heard Senator Byrd singing the blues. >> You mean the Byrd singing? That's a joke, son. I'm sorry. I I keep chucking them at you, you keep flubbing them. Look alive, son. On your toes. >> I'll try, Senator. What what are you up to these days in the Senate? A big medical research project, son. My committee has appropriated the money to cure the common cold. You found a cure for the common cold? >> Son, there ain't a rabbit in that laboratory with the sniffles. Why, that's wonderful, Senator. You've eliminated the common cold. >> Not so fast, son. But, you said This cure won't work for people. You mean >> But, if you know a rabbit with a cold, you just send him to me. Senator, our question tonight is about a rise in the income >> Yeah, well, it's got to say it's got to happen, son. We got the Ways and Means Committee. Ways and Means Committee? >> Yeah, no matter what ways you figure out to keep it, we'll find the means to take it away from you. So long, son. So long, that is. Now, let's see what Mr. Moody thinks about the rise in the income tax. Howdy, Bub. Well, Mr. Moody, you're looking chipper. Well, every reason I should. I just got a clean bill of health. You went to the doctor? No, no. The vet come here. >> You were examined by a veterinarian? >> Yeah, he come to look over the stock. Yes. So, I sneaked down to the bar and stood in one of the stalls. I see. The vet's nearsighted. After feeling my withers and counting my teeth What did he say? Said I ought to win a blue ribbon. Didn't expect that one, did you? Uh actually, no. I ain't all ruby, you know. Well, Mr. Moody, what do you think about the proposed rise in the income tax? Don't mean nothing to me. You mean you don't care if the tax rises or not? >> Nah, I've always ready for them fellas. You are? Every year when it comes income tax time Yes. Every year when it comes income tax time Yes. I drop whatever I'm doing and I go deer hunting. But, what does going deer hunting have to do with your income tax? Well, no matter what I owe No matter what you owe >> I can always send them a couple of bucks. So long, Bub. Well, let's try this next door. No. Well, Mrs. Nussbaum. You're expecting maybe Shapiro Agnew. You're all dressed up, Mrs. Ann. Are you going to a party? I'm coming from a wedding. I see. A relative, perhaps. My second cousin once removed on my mother's side. Anastasia Pinkus by name. >> Did the father give the bride away? Gladly. You see, I'm beauty and Anastasia is not. Then, how did they find her a husband? Oh, they employed the services of Rappaport the matchmaker. A medical viker. I see. Rappaport looked high and low. Finally, he found a boy. And he introduced him to Anastasia? Oh, not yet. He's afraid one peek and all is lost, you understand? So, he arranges that he not see Anastasia until after the ceremony when she removes her veil. Did the bride wear something old? Her mother's sneakers. Something new? Uh a genuine simulated rhinestone lavalier, compliments of Coro sets. Something borrowed? The money for the license. And something blue? Oh, this is the color the groom is turning when he sees Anastasia. Well, Mrs. Nussbaum, what do you think about them raising the income tax? >> Oh, I'm glad you asked me because the income tax is leading to the biggest mistake of my life. >> Just what was that big mistake? I went to an expert, excuse expression. >> Uh you're excused. In the window is a sign reading, "Taxes prepared, but also free snacks." So, you went in? >> Naturally. And over the lox and cream cheese, he filled out my form. Yes. And over the borscht, he totaled my income. I see. And when it came to the kreplach, he's adding my deductions. And when he finished We held hands through the cheesecake crumbs. You mean the tax expert became >> My husband, Pierre. Thank you. Well, I see Ajax Cassidy is home. His shamrock underwear is drying on the line. Here now, WHO'S CAUSING ALL THE RUCKUS? WHO'S BEATING THE RIG A JIG ON ME AGAIN? WHO'S DISTURBING THE PEACE? OH, IT'S YOU, ME BOY. HOW DO YOU DO? How do you do? >> Well, Mr. Cassidy, how are you? TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE. I'M NOT LONG FOR this world. I am suffering from Brannigan's complaint. Brannigan's complaint? You see, I owe knuckle Brannigan $5. Last night, he asked me for it. When I told him I didn't have it >> Yes. He registered his complaint with his fists. Say, that's too bad. Well, Mr. Cassidy, what do you think of the rise in the income tax? Me boy, it is of no importance to me at all at all with 17 dependents. You support 17 dependents? I do. That would be Mrs. Cassidy and >> And the bar tending staff at McCaffrey's saloon. Goodbye to you, boy. I didn't actually copy anybody in the news uh for the senator. I had played a character that I called Dynamite Gus. And that uh that say Dynamite had a faculty of repeating cuz you might not have heard. Uh I say you might not have heard what he said. We're saying that is, you know, cuz it was very important that you hear what he was saying. That's a joke now. Laugh it up. Be alert, girl. Well, that was that was my Dynamite Gus. Uh that's the character that uh Minnie Pious told Fred about and he heard it and loved it and made him a senator. In the Alley, I played Pansy Nussbaum. It was a character that I'd played from time to time before the Alley was formed. And then when when Fred uh when censorship got tight uh with the war coming in Europe, it was already there in [clears throat] fact, he decided on these characters for the alley. And he gave the the same woman the name Pansy Nussbaum. Nussbaum means nut tree in German. Well, I was born old and I've been doing >> [laughter] >> old man and farmers mostly for many, many years since I was quite young. Perhaps you've guessed I'm from New England. And and he he was small town New England. That's what the character was. But Fred had the character that was called Titus Moody. I mean Titus Moody was Fred's name. I'd like to interrupt to say that I was playing on the Alan show on the Alan's Alley a little Irishman by the name of Ajax Cassidy. This phone call one day, man said, he said, "I represent the Irish people in New York and we're going to picket your show unless you cease and desist immediately doing this spoof of the great and honorable Irish people." I said, "Exactly how many of you are there?" Well, he said, "There's millions. There's all kinds of He said, "There's There's a There's a large group and we're I said, "Subscribers to the Irish Echo or the Pilot in Boston or are you a are you a a national group like the Irish Republican Army?" Well, no, he said, "There's It's within the neighborhood There's a great a bunch of us." [laughter] I said, "What comprises this bunch?" Well, he says, "There's a friend of mine and a widow lady WHO LIVES DOWNSTAIRS." >> [laughter] >> END OF RIOT. END OF DEMONSTRATION. >> [laughter] >> The alley was an important part of the show, but the Fred's opening was just as important. His very important commentary. Then there was the alley, then there was the interview with the guest, then the guest sketch, and then that would that was the show. I think Fred opened up the whole idea of topical commentary. I think until that time everybody was depending pretty much on sketches, a lot that had been brought up from vaudeville and review and so forth. And Fred began to mention actual actual people, actual places, actual events, and to do use them as takeoffs for comedy. Fred read nine or 10 papers a week and we all read all the local papers and we'd clip clippings that we thought might have some bearing or might have possibilities of a joke. He was a constantly on the lookout for something in the news. >> [applause] >> Earlier in the evening, this telegram arrived from Washington. It says, "Dear Fred Allen, be careful what you say tonight. Remember what happened to me. Signed, Henry Wallace." Now, many people wonder why over a week elapsed before Henry was asked for his resignation. Well, the truth is that the president didn't know what to do until he heard from Drew Pearson. Well enough about politics, ladies and gentlemen. It is nice to come to Minneapolis where things are so quiet and orderly. When I left New York last week, a nimbus of havoc hung over the city. Every Everybody heard that on Information, Please. All is wonderful here. But everybody in New York seemed to be out on strike. The stock market went down. Meat was selling for more than General Motors when I left. Meat was so scarce the city put up a sign in the lion's cage at the zoo, "Do not throw meat out to people." The reason they call radio a medium is because nothing's well done on it. >> [music] >> A conference of radio executives is a meeting at which a group of men who singly can do nothing agree collectively that nothing can be done. A network vice president is a man who comes into his office every morning and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5:00 to make that molehill into a mountain. I have just returned from Boston. It is the only sane thing to do if you find yourself up there. All the sincerity in Hollywood you could stuff into a flea's navel and still have room enough left over to conceal eight caraway seeds and an agent's heart. Well, Fred, what's on your mind? I have just finished a picture called It's in the Bag. Aren't you forgetting, Fred, that I too have been in your picture? >> Rudy, how can I forget? After all, I wrote that part for you. I'm all set now. I'm staying at the home of one of the big producers at the studio. Rudy, you should see that house. What luxury, even for Hollywood. That guy is overdoing it. Is it really that luxurious? Rudy, it's the first house I've ever seen where the mousetraps are baited with cheese souffle. And those furnishings, the rugs are the softest I've ever seen. Why, you sink so deep in them that you can entertain dinner guests in your shorts without them ever KNOWING IT. I STAYED AT JACK BENNY'S house for a while. That was murder. I lost 20 lb and my watch the first week. Wasn't Jack having >> any food around his place? Food? The mice run through Benny's house with tears in their eyes, Rudy. What is Jack charging his guests these days? >> Well, $18 European plan and it's the same American plan. You mean there's no difference? No, you get the same amount of food, but with the American plan, Benny hangs a flag in your room. Fred worked in a piano store in Boston where he was from. And then he worked in a library and while he was in the library he had a chance to read and he loved reading and he read so many things. The diversification of things. And then he then he went into vaudeville and did many different acts. He was a juggler at one point. >> juggler. The world's worst juggler he had. The world's worst ventriloquist, too. >> Did he do ventriloquist? >> Freddy St. James, he took the name. John Florence Sullivan is his square name. Portland joined in and the act went so badly that he finally put a put a flag up on the screen and played Columbia, the gem of the ocean. >> lived for him. Absolutely. She was a beautiful chorus girl that he fell in love with. No, but on the show on the show she was a little girl. >> Little iodine girl. Almost almost a Gracie Allen character. >> Almost. Fred wanted to go into television with a show and it's a real sadness with a kind of a show that has become increasingly popular on television. He wanted to go into television with a talk show. But in those days the rigid uh formulas were in and so they put him NBC put him in a show called the Colgate Comedy Hour, one-hour show with a with choreographers and dancing girls and everything. And if you remember the times the time this was during the Cold War and it was the time when you weren't to rock the boat. So you you you couldn't do anything controversial or anything like that and that was Fred's stock in trade, not controversy necessary, but but topical. So he went back and adapted some of his old uh radio spots and they didn't adapt very well. When you got them up on their feet in front of the camera, they just didn't turn out to be too too great entertainment. There was a certain type of imaginative comedy that could be written for and performed only on radio. But we are living in a machine age and for the first time the comedian is being compelled to compete with a machine. The successful comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion. Television inherited situation comedy from radio. In the '30s, the most popular show of this kind was Amos 'n' Andy. Freeman Gosden and Charles Correll started it all. The program The Goldbergs ran them a close second. In the '40s, the top situation comedy was Fibber McGee and Molly. Here's Jim Jordan who played Fibber McGee. He no longer lives at radio's most popular address, 79 Wistful Vista, but he's about to go back there now. The Johnson Wax program with Fibber MCGEE AND MOLLY. THE MAKERS OF JOHNSON'S WAX PRODUCTS for home and industry present Fibber McGee and Molly with Bill Thompson, Gale Gordon, Arthur Q. Bryan and me, Harlow Wilcox. The script is by Don Quinn and Phil Leslie. Music by the King's Men and Billy Mills' orchestra. >> [music] >> Oh, McGee, it's Mayor La Trivia. Hello, Mr. Mayor. >> Hello, Molly. McGee, how do you do? Sit down briefly. >> [laughter] >> According to my schedule, I can give you 1 minute and 10 seconds, boy. I'll settle for the 10 seconds, McGee. I've had it. Good day. >> OH, NO, MR. Don't go. You just sit right here and visit with me a while. Himself here is on a tighter schedule than the Berlin Airlift, but I'm loafing. I'm putting the housework on a business basis, La Triv. Everything on schedule. Efficiency, boy. You ought to try that at the city hall sometime. I'm trying to get several efficiency measures through the city council now, McGee. In fact, I had lunch at the hotel with President Bates of the council yesterday to talk about it. Bates? Isn't he the man who fought you so hard the last time you ran for mayor, Mr. Mayor? And you had lunch with him? Yes. Yes, if it will help to improve our government, Mrs. McGee, I can work with him. Politics, you know, make strange bedfellows. >> [laughter] >> How was that again, La Triv? Hm? Oh, I merely remarked that politics make strange bedfellows. You see >> And did you have to stay overnight, MR. MAYOR? >> [laughter] >> OVERNIGHT? WHERE? AT THE HOTEL WHERE YOU HAD LUNCH. You said there was a strange fellow in your bed, so naturally >> [laughter] >> No, no, McGee, I didn't mean that. >> McGee found a horse in his BED ONE TIME. YEAH, HE FOUND A HORSE IN HIS BED ONE TIME AT A Legion convention, Mr. Mayor. >> [laughter] >> But a bed full of strange politicians is worse. Yeah. You can shoot a horse, but a politician >> [laughter] >> Uh uh please uh just a minute. When I said politics make strange bedfellows, >> You said a mouthful, boy. You really did. I went to a political rally in Chicago one time and had a share a room with two fat senators and a ward heeler named Beeler. Was there a heeler named Beeler in your room, Mr. Latrivia, because of >> [laughter] >> No. No, there wasn't. I didn't have any room. I didn't say I had a room. There wasn't any room at all, do you understand? >> I'll say we understand, boy. The way them hotels ram six or eight politicians in a room that was built for three brooms and a bucket, there ain't room in the room for anybody. >> [laughter] >> How could you sleep that way, Latrivia, with all >> I didn't sleep that way. Huh? I SLEEP THAT WAY. HEY! I MEAN, LOOK. NOW, NOW. >> [laughter] >> HEY! MR. MAYOR, DON'T SHOUT. THIS NOISE WON'T SETTLE THIS. NO, SIR. Be calm, boy. Where are your friends, Latrivia? Heaven help me. >> [laughter] >> Now, you said you went to a luncheon, Mr. Mayor. >> Yes. And then you said politics make strange bedfellows. >> Yes, but I was >> Tell me one thing. Was there a ward heeler named Beeler there? >> [laughter] >> Because of all the strange bedfellows, he snored LOUDER THAN >> THERE WASN'T ANY STRANGE BEDFELLOW. A STRANGE BEDFELLOW. A WET FELLOW. LOOK, WHEN [screaming] I SAID POLITICS MAKE STRANGE HOT YOU A STRANGE BEDFELLOWS. THERE I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT A STRANGE ROOM FULL OF POLITICIANS. I'M FULL OF POLITICIANS. POLITICIANS. POLITICIANS. YOU'RE THE ONE THAT'S STRANGE. I DIDN'T MEAN YOU ALWAYS I YOU >> [laughter] >> MCGEE. >> [laughter] >> YES, BOY? I'd like to ask a favor. The police department pistol team is shooting target practice tomorrow morning. Would you help them out? >> Oh, he'd love to, Mr. Mayor. >> I'll be there, boy. Hey, what do they shoot at, Latrivia? You'll find out. Gale Gordon, who did Mayor Latrivia, always the same way. Always great. Fibber McGee and Molly was was There was a lot of fantasy. Took place in a mythical town, of course, called Wistful Vista. This town was mythical and the street they lived on was mythical. Wistful Vista was not a small town, either. It was a huge metropolis if we wanted it to be. It was anything we wanted it to be. You know, the basis of all humor in the back in the beginning of the theater and so on was was the lie. Mr. McGee, it gives me a great deal of pleasure to inform you that you are now the champion liar of the world. He was always a liar and a bum. He He had uh He never did anything. He never worked. And uh just a guy that caused trouble. He always got in fights with his friends. And he'd And salt them and he he wouldn't play fair with them or anything else. But how he kept his friends, nobody knows, but he did. >> [laughter] >> That's what was amazing. And this is what people enjoyed. Doc Gamble, he shouldn't have been a friend of a bum like this guy was, but he was because he enjoyed him and he felt that he was better. Actually, we all think we're better than that guy, which we are, I hope. Well, for goodness' sakes, McGee, look who just came in. Hello, Dr. Gamble. Hello, my dear. >> Hi, Doc. And what are you doing in the magic shop, Fumblethumb? If you're trying to find out how to make yourself disappear, please do so and have them send me the bill. Uh may I ask what you're doing in here, doctor? Are you a magician? Is he a magician? You ever see his wizard thermometer? He sticks it under your tongue and pulls 300 bucks out of your pocket. Look, wobble jaw. I'm an even-tempered man and I dislike to brawl in public. But a few more of your snide comments and I shall be forced to throw a few knuckles into your unpaid for teeth. Who's going to throw whose knuckles into whose what? Why, you creaky old has-been that never was. You make one move toward me and I'll stomp your mushy old frame right into the woodwork. Oh, yes? >> [laughter] >> Don't forget I've seen your muscles, such as they are. And I happen to know you couldn't go two rounds with Marvin O'Brien. You are soft as the obbligato to Mother McCree. Boys, boys, boys. My goodness, after all Well, I don't think my character came from me. I I I mean, I don't think I was Fibber McGee in the least. I think I was the direct opposite from Fibber McGee. I didn't have a dirty closet. I I wasn't a liar. I was very uh I I just couldn't I couldn't tell a lie and get away with it if I wanted to. I don't think I was the same as Fibber McGee. I think I that was just a character that I played. That's where I've always felt about it. The bell would ring and that would be the entrance cue for whoever it was, of course. Hello there, Mr. Wimpel. Oh, hi, Wimp. Hello, folks. Taking a little stroll, Mr. Wimpel? Yes, in a way, Mrs. McGee. Oh, but mostly I'm sort of a refugee. Mhm. Sweetie Face, that's my big old wife, you know. Yes, we know. She's giving a bridge party for a lot of matrons. What do you mean, matrons? Older women? No, I mean matrons from the county jail. Come in. Oh, hi, Old Timer. >> Hello, Mr. Old Timer. Hello there, kids. Hey, what you doing with a rope around your neck, Johnny? >> Oh, I was just GETTING READY OH, DON'T DO IT, JOHNNY. THINGS CAN'T BE THAT BAD, BOY. WHY, HE'S just going to see Well, reconsider, Johnny. Don't be hasty. WHAT IF YOU ARE a dismal FAILURE IN LIFE? WHY, WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE, JOHNNY, I was a failure, too. Not as bad as you are, BUT A FAILURE. NOW, LOOK AT ME. NO, THAT AIN'T GOING to settle it, is it? Come in. Well, hello, Mrs. McGee. Hello, little chum. GILDERSLEEVE. WHY, NICE NICE TO SEE YOU, MR. GILDERSLEEVE. Won't you have a chair and a cup of tea? >> Uh no, thank you, Mrs. McGee. I can't stay but a moment. I just dropped in to say goodbye. Oh, my lawnmower. What about your lawnmower? McGee never returned it and I'm going to need it in Summerfield. Now, wait a minute, Gildersleeve. You know very well that ain't your own lawnmower. It is, too. You borrowed it. It was mine and you borrowed it. Boys, boys, boys. My good Well, I'd go to answer the phone and and or go to take down the phone to get a number and I'd say Hello, operator. Give me the residence of Throckmorton P. Gildersleeve. Huh? Oh, is that you, Mert? Dear, oh dear. How's every little thing, Mert? And I'd say, "Oh, is that you, Mert? Well, how's every little thing, Mert? Is that so? When he did >> What? Oh, your beautiful Afghan, huh? Lost it. Well, what happened? Oh, I see. You went back to Afghanistan. I never saw such a man. You either work like fury for a few minutes or you sit down doing nothing. I know. I'm a member of the sweater set. I either sweat or set. Don't forget it, mommy. I says I'm a member of the sweater set. It ain't funny, McGee. We grew up together. We were young teenagers together in the same town, Peoria, Illinois. That's where we met, of course. And that's where we were married and then we went into show business after we were married. To go back to the early days of radio, there were very few women that could really could speak and be heard and and liked. She had the voice for this. She was the balancing influence that kept him from going to jail or having somebody beat him up. She kept things on a kind of an even keel. Well, the material would come from our own lives and it would come from the lives of the people on the show. And the more real it was, the the better it was. The more believable a situation could be, why easier it was to get laughs with it. Hey, remember when we were kids in Peoria and I built that big hollow snowman with a tunnel under it and I'd crawl into it at night and talk to people when they walked past? Remember that? Yeah. Uh we went on some beautiful sleigh rides in Peoria, too. In fact, I think the first time you ever kissed me was the night you rented the cutter from the livery stable. Well, I had to kiss you, Tootsie. Had too much invested to waste the evening. I told you hands is all right in the summertime, but when it comes mitten weather, a man has to establish better contacts. I'll bet tonight would be a beautiful night for a sleigh ride, McGee. I know where I can get a sleigh. Farmer friend of mine out on Route 62, Mel Hess. His name is Mel of a Hess, but they call him Mel for short. He'll rent us a sleigh. Well, I'll I'll call old Mel, then, huh? >> What's his number, dearie? >> I don't know. I got it wrote down in a little book here some Oh, I know. It's right here in the hall closet. I hate sleigh rides. >> Oh, it won't take a minute. I know HE'S AND CHARLIE, YES, THROCKMORTON, IF YOU HAD your life to live over again, what changes would you make? Well, let's see. If I had my life to live over again, I I would make the same mistakes, yeah. Only start sooner this time. Get the point? >> Yeah, I get it, yes, sir. I loved this Sunday >> [music] >> each Sunday with you as friend to friend. I'm sorry it's through. >> [music] >> I'm telling you just how I feel. >> [music] >> I hope you feel that way, too. Let's make a date for next Sunday. All right, I'm going to interrupt the credits because I have to rush away for a Zoom call. Yeah, so that's the the whole series uh of the Great Radio Comedians, and we got some of the high points there. We figured out where Foghorn Leghorn came from, uh and also some of the other bits that show up in uh cartoons of that time. Uh I hope everybody has a great weekend, and I will see you on Monday. Everybody take care, and we will see you soon. Hit the thumbs up, the like. You can donate via Patreon, via the Super Thanks button, Venmo, buy us coffee. Those are all great ways to support us. Everybody have a great weekend.