Are We Still Going To The Movie? - Adolescent Sexual Conflict

e [Music] this is fantastic it's nicer over there I think really is glad that we came here okay come on now okay go first take it easy okay got it yeah I got to get it okay yes what do you think I think it's great come on how's this this is fine you want some help I think I got it okay that's fine yeah that's good it's beautiful be nice to have a fire I don't think we're supposed to they look really nice I'm starved aren't you Jack don't what's the matter nothing you don't love me anymore huh don't be funny well then come on Jack don't I mean it hey what's eating you nothing I'd like to have a picnic that's all isn't that what we're doing you know what I mean no I don't well I just thought it would be nice to have a picnic without without your moving on me like that I didn't move on you come on nice secluded place a blanket telling me how nice I look I've seen the same movies you have let me see there's tuna fish and there's a [Music] falony what kind do you want Jack I don't care come on Jack what if I did move on you so what it's just that it didn't I don't know I thought we were going to have a picnic it's so beautiful thought we'd sit it and eat and talk and have fun you know sure so did I let's do it okay okay isn't that bad no it's all right I'm I'm just not very hungry where are the cokes we left them in the van I'll go get them it's okay I really don't want to listen I'm sorry I made you mad I really didn't mean to I'm not mad should have brought some beer picnics aren't any good without beer why didn't you cuz I knew you'd if I did I wouldn't Jack come on come on you know you're just like my little brother when he doesn't get what he wants he pouts let's sit down okay this picnic has sure turned out great hasn't it I know I'm [Music] sorry so am I we haven't had much fun lately I know I don't know what's wrong with you me yeah with you you're the one who's changed I mean for 6 months things were really going good you know we were getting it on and everything and I haven't taken out another girl in months but now you make me feel uncomfortable even when I touch you or anything like it was wrong I didn't mean it was wrong I just said we don't always have to end up making out that's all you never used to complain maybe I don't remember too well but I thought we were in love I do love you but well sometimes you treat me like like sex was the whole point of everything I mean we could do other things too come on we do other things I don't believe you Dana I mean half the guys I know are really making it with the girls they're with we just oh do you compare notes that's not what I mean then what do you mean I mean you can't say that we're only into sex when we don't really make it it must be really rough on you not having anything to report when you talk to the guys now you're great at changing the subject anyway I suppose you don't talk things over with your friends no at least not the way you talk about it with the guys like it was all some kind of a game and the idea is to rack up as many points as you can where are now I'm beginning to think that Eddie was right about what he just said you were very uptight you want to know what Sandy Corman said about you that you have a one track mind okay let's go where home really sore aren't you what do you think I think I'm sorry yeah sure let's go the way you're acting proves I'm right you're sore because you couldn't just turn me on like some kind of machine sure Dana look I'll tell you what we'll make up some rules and some regulations and whenever we meet will talk about heavy things like religion and philosophy and then when you feel more like a person maybe we can hold hands a while okay now get off the blanket will you are we still going to the movies tonight I don't know well are we going to do anything anymore I don't know will you get off the blanket please for a quarrel between a girl and boy one afternoon in the park becomes the turning point in their relationship maybe even the end of it there are any number of ways you might think about such a confrontation we hope the film would start you thinking about what boys usually expect from girls and what girls usually expect from boys and how and why those expectations can be so different what do Dana and Jack expect from each other that they are not getting are the cliches generally true do most boys expectations come from seeing it all as kind of a game with making out the whole point of the relationship does a girl usually expect something else a more lasting commitment do girls encourage expectations in boys that they don't intend to fulfill Adena believes that boys compare notes on their conquests the implication is that they encourage each other to regard girls as objects to be pursued as things rather than persons is that really how boys talk with one another what is the difference between the way boys talk about girls and girls talk about boys do girls also use boys as objects remember Jack's outrage at the very suggestion he might be doing anything wrong or insensitive it suggests that he regards his own behavior towards Dana as perfectly normal and natural well is it natural for boys to make out at every opportunity if the girl objects does that mean she's uptight maybe neurotic not as feminine as she ought to be a lot of people seem to assume that the difference between what boys and girls expect from each other are natural and inevitable rooted in biological differences do you agree with that or do we in fact learn how to behave I mean is there a lot of role playing in it are boys and girls taught by movies magazines television friends and the adults they look up to that they they should behave in certain ways what does Dana expect that jack isn't giving she seems to be afraid of continuing as before with him and and afraid of hurting or even losing him if she changes what creates those fears when Dana Compares Jack to her kid brother who pouts when he doesn't get his way Jack is resentful would most guys react that way why does it make him so sore because it's unfair because there's truth in it or does Dana mean it to be a heavy put down to his sense of masculinity suppose Jack and Dana thought it over and decided to really try and meet each other's expectations how might that change their relationship